Luke 14:33
The Message (MSG)
33"Simply put, if you're not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can't be my disciple."
God never ceases to amaze me. I know some people aren't "fans" of Facebook, but I absolutely love it. I don't post a whole lot, but I love to read friend's updates and see pictures. I've enjoyed re-connecting with old friends. It's helped me stay "social" even when I didn't feel like leaving the house. My most favorite thing, however, is when God sends me a fresh word from a friend. I know when I post a Bible verse, typically it is something that has spoken to me. The thing that amazes me is how God uses it to speak to others as well. A friend posted the above verse on his page a few days ago. I am sure I've heard this verse before, but I know not since Brad left this world. I immediately copied and pasted it to my status, along with the comment, "wow." Just wow! I've been mulling over those words for awhile, thinking about the last few weeks. God has really been speaking to me. I guess maybe I had slowed down long enough to hear Him? This journey has been so difficult, but God says in Jeremiah (MSG) "I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. 12"When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen. 13-14"When you come looking for me, you'll find me. "Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed." (you may be more familiar with the NIV version: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.")
Looking back at the verse from Luke, then contemplating the words from Jeremiah….well, God definitely has my attention. As I've written before, I grew up in the church. I accepted Jesus as my savior before I was a teenager. I went to a Baptist college (shhh…don't tell anyone I made a "C" in Old Testament! ha!). I went to church all the time. The point I'm trying to make is that it doesn't matter how long you've been a Christian. It doesn't matter how much you think you know Him. God is going to use your circumstances - both good and bad - to draw His people to Him. Sometimes it is for those who don't know Him at all. But sometimes, it's for those who "think" they know Him. If you had asked me before Brad's death if I knew God, my answer would be "Of course!" Ohhhh, how far from the truth that has been! God's purpose for us on this earth is to win souls for Christ. To prepare ourselves for eternity. Are you really ready for eternity? Let's re-visit that verse from Luke: "Simply put, if you're not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can't be my disciple." "Simply put"….. simple. Easy. No hesitation. "What is dearest to you"…..your husband, your children, your family, friends, perhaps your home or even money. What do you think you just absolutely cannot live without? What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear "what is dearest to you?" Now here's the kicker. The words no one really want to read. A situation we really don't want to find ourselves in. Be ready to say goodbye to what matters most to you in this world, because it can be taken away in a moment. Whatever "it" is cannot be put ahead of God and His plan for us to be His disciples. I would have never said "Sure, Lord, I can kiss my husband good-bye forever so I can be your disciple." Read that again. No one wants to be willing to lose what is most dear to them. Yet that is what God wants. He wants to be first in your life. He wants to be what is most dear to you. He wants you to be His disciple, but you can't do that if you aren't willing to let something go that you think you never could.
Before Brad died, I thought I had a good relationship with God. That could not be further than the truth. Oh, I read scripture and went to church and Bible studies…but can I say I was willing to give up what was most dear to me? No! Could I really, truly say I was "serious about finding me and want it more than anything else?" Honestly, no. Yet here I am nearly 2 years after kissing my husband of nearly 19 years good-bye. I'm still here. I've made it this far. I'm becoming God's disciple. Now I can say I'm willing to give up anything for Him. Do I think it is easy? Do I think it would be easy if I had to kiss something or even someone else good-bye? Of course not! But God has been teaching me over these past painful months that He is making me His disciple. The night Brad died, I told my pastor that I had a peace about the whole situation. That didn't mean an acceptance. I didn't really want to accept that God had taken Brad away from so soon. But I had peace. I don't believe God is chaotic. I don't believe He started that Saturday thinking "I think I'll bring Brad home today." No. He already knew that was part of His plan. Ponder the words from David: "all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." God has a plan. Before we were even born, He had a plan for us. Our plans are not His! Jeremiah speaks of this as well: "Before I shaped you in the womb, I knew all about you. Before you saw the light of day, I had holy plans for you: A prophet to the nations— that's what I had in mind for you." When we think of prophet, we might think of Biblical prophets, or the gift of prophecy. However, the word prophet is derived from the Greek language. When translated, it means "to speak." So, essentially, we are all God's prophets! He wants us to speak about Him! I have felt from the very beginning that God wanted me to speak about Him during this journey. A journey I would have never chosen, but now see as part of God's purpose for my life. Now before anyone thinks I "have it all together," don't be fooled! Every day is a struggle! But every day, I wake up thankful that I serve a God of love, comfort and peace. A God who provides me with all I need. A God that I am willing to let go of anything for. I'm still a work in progress, though.
There's my note drifted down from Heaven. It just took me awhile to find it.
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